Updated: I feel dirty.

Note: I would like to begin this post with the fact that I know many "normal" people who enjoy name brand clothes and purchase them at the mall. It just so happens that those people are not at the mall at the same time that I am in the mall.

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This afternoon I found myself walking among the superficiality of [insert scary music clip here]...the mall. And now I feel dirty.

I know there are lots of people in this world that adore the mall but I am not one of those people. I went there for, of all things, hiking boots. I've not had any luck with finding hiking boots at the outfitters in Lexington so I thought I'd give Dick's Sporting Goods a whirl, after all, that is where I bought the pair of boots I currently wear.

First, I'm not a big fan of Dick's Sporting Goods. It was a Monday afternoon and not terribly busy and I still had to chase down a sales clerk to get the boots so I could try them on. Once the guy came over to the shoe department he acted like I was the biggest inconvenience of the week. I'm glad none of the boots fit well because I really didn't want to give Dick's any business anyway.

I remembered a shoe store in the mall that sold Birkenstocks, etc and I thought they sold hiking boots as well. I looked all over, including the seemingly ONLY directory in the whole stinking mall. No luck. No store. No boots.

Rats. Still no boots and I forced myself to walk among the go-go boots, Tommy Hilfiger, and hangy-outy bellies of the mall. And then of course, my favorite outfit spotted today...denim mini-skirt with leg warmers and flip-flops. For crying out loud, what happened to mirrors?

I also noticed that like 3 out of 5 women were pregnant. I didn't drink the water just in case it was contagious.

So still no boots and the mall is still a ridiculously over-priced superficial conglomerate of metrosexuals and material girls.

Don't worry, next time I won't hold back. I'll tell you how I really feel.